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Custody Narcissistic Father

Coparenting is a really hard job, and when you are coparenting with a narcissist it just ups the ante. And then living separately from that narcissist, either by way of separation or divorce, and sharing the responsibility for caring for this child becomes an even greater challenge, because you are not there to supervise. You are not there to step in. You are not there to do the quick fix. When the child needs something repaired emotionally because the narcissistic parent has said something absolutely hurtful or critical or too demanding.

For the child. so there is a lot of repair work that has to happen. and the burden really does fall on the nonnarcissistic parent to be sure to be issuing messages that will counteract the effects of the narcissistic parent those that might be too harsh, too critical, those that forget to notice the loveliness of the child just being who they are, that forget about their own innate wonderfulness and specialness. And so the nonnarcissistic parent has to carry that load of making sure that the language is tailored to try to overcome and accommodate.

What is happening with the narcissistic parent. one of the privileges of living apart from the narcissistic partner is that you have a little bit more of leverage and more room permission actually to help your child to appreciate that: ‘you know, I think your dad loves you very much. I don’t think he means to do what he does. But it’s not OK, and it really is his problem or your mom’s problem. It is her problem. It’s not about you. I know that’s hard because your dad means so much to you and everything he says really.

Difficult Personalities in a Child Custody Case Los Angeles Child Custody Attorney David Pisarra

Hey guys david pisarra here with mensfamilylaw . have you got a personality disordered spouse? Is that what we’re dealing with in a a child custody case? Listen up and let’s see what you’ve got. There’s three main problem personality types we deal with in divorce and child custody cases. There’s a manic/depressive and they kinda have an up down problem. they go from being really happy to really sad to really happy to really sad. They’re not that big.

Of a deal when it comes to child custody, then we’ve got the narcissistic. the narcissistic personality is somebody who its all about them. No matter what you’re doing it’s about how it affects them. No matter what you’re saying, it’s how they look. No matter what you’re doing, it’s how they’re going to feel. The third most dangerous one that we deal with is the borderline personality. This is somebody that looks at you and in the beginning part of your relationship you probably were the prince charming, you probably were the.

Best thing that ever happened. the most wonderful boyfriend, the most fantastic husband. and along came a child and the focus shifted and when the focus shifted, you suddenly became worthless, useless, the worst thing ever, horrible, the meanest, most inconsiderate, thoughtless, terrible, negligent, incompetent parent of all time. That’s the borderline personality. You’re going from one extreme to the other. You go from Oh My God you’re the best thing ever to, horrible horrendous, terrible parent. The problem that we deal.

With is, narcissistic and borderline personalities can’t really be cured. and they’re very difficult to deal with when we get into court because they’re usually very convincing. They’re very manipulative. They’re very good at making the judge feel like Well they’re just the most concerned parent ever, and you clearly are just a negligent human being. So when we’re dealing with these as parties in a divorce, we frequently have to bring in a psychologist to try and explain what’s going on and we put each side through some testing to figure.

Out what’s really going on and with the personalities and who’s going to be the more stable and loving parent. And who’s really telling the truth. Because oftentimes the really controlling manipulative person is able to spin things so that it looks like you are the one that’s wrong. Even though they are the ones who are at fault. I hope that gives you a sort of a brief overview of what we’re dealing with here with the manic depressive personality, the narcissistic personality and the borderline. I’m not psychologist, so you probably gotta.

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