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Divorce Custody Depression

the most important factor is what isthe child’s home state the home state is defined by the uniform child custody jurisdiction enforcement act as the child’s residence for the priorsix months if the child has not resided in any jurisdiction for the prior sixmonths the next inquiry is to determine what state has been the child’s most significant contact if thecourt cannot

determine the significant contacts then there will be a factual inquiry like all laws in the state of California thereare exceptions to the UCCJEA and that is that the court canexercise jurisdiction in the case of emergencies such as domestic violence or child abuse.

Voice of the Child of Divorce

Dear Mom and Dad, I know that you are hurting.I’m hurting, too. I feel and feed off your tension, fear and shock. Although I’m young and cannot express verbally what is happening in our lives, I’m still feeling the impact. My heart is broken every time I have to give up a parent. My sense of security is lost. Please don’t assume that I am resilient. Please don’t assume that my life will be exactly as it was and that I will continue to feel the same love from both of you. I am a human being just like you. My needs are just like yours. I need love, attention, nurturing, stability, consistency, affection, understanding, patience

and mostly to be wanted. When you fight over me or put me in the middle of your argument, you are sending me the message thatwinning with each other is more important than my life. I am learning from you thatis better to be right than to be loved. You are teaching me that I came from a personwho is unlovable and wrong, and that I am somehow wrong, too. When you confide your hurt in my heart, you are storing up adult pain and robbing me of my childhood. You are taking away my belief that love is unconditional

and replacing it with a message that tellsme to become hard and not to love because I will get hurt and not be able to recover. You may not understand this today, and I am so small that you are not thinking about my future, but you are putting me at a greater risk of getting a divorce myself. At times you are risking my safety to fill a void in your heart. My safety is your job. Without you and your protection I am unshielded from the world. This will manifest in irrational fears for me, because I will stay in a state of fight or flight for most of my life. Someday this initial shock will wear off, but how you choose to parent me through this crisis

will never wear off. I will either feel your sense of selflessness, support and protection, or I will have a scar on my heart with a message that reads, quot;Good things happen to good people.I must be bad.quot; Thoughtfully, The Child of Divorce.

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